Pumpkin on Windowsill
Backstory: I have a black thumb. I laugh when people say, "Make sure you contain mint when you plant it or it will take over your entire garden." I have yet to keep any type of mint alive long enough for it to take over anything. I planted several pumpkins, cucumbers, watermelons, and cantaloupe from starts that a friend gave us. They died.
I was watering the garden a couple of weeks ago and heard the next door neighbor said to his wife, "Honey, these watermelons are twice the size that they were the last time I was out here. Same with the pumpkins." I was tempted to accidentally water the neighbor, but then I remembered that he's a really nice guy. Let him have his melons. I will start new ones.
So say "hello" to my cute little pumpkin. It will act as a houseplant until it is too big for its container. I will then gradually introduce it to the elements and when I think it is strong enough to plant in the garden, I will lovingly place it in its new home.
And it will die.
I am a herbicide.