Ken and Pen----You're it!

Septembermom, over at My Voice, My View tagged me today for a meme. Unlike the last time I got tagged for a meme, I now know how to pronounce the word “meme.” Head on over there to read her answers too!

The Rules for this meme:
1. Respond and rework. Answer the questions on your blog. Replace one question that you dislike with a question of your invention, and add one more question of your own.

2. Tag other people.

What is your current obsession?
I could have just kept septembermom’s answer, because my obsession is whatever dancing show happens to be running at the moment. For now, it’s So You Think You Can Dance. I even watch the show with pen and notebook in hand in case I come across a song I like, or in case I want to watch a certain performance over again on youtube.

What are you wearing today?
My favorite blue jeans along with my coolest shirt—a turquoise blue button down. That’s coolest as in “least likely to cause heat stroke in the Utah desert,” not coolest as in “Dang, you look fine.” For shoes I am wearing my taupe Skechers with burgundy embroidery on the side.

What’s for dinner?
We had roasted chicken and baked potatoes. It’s now 11:30 p.m. and I have dessert in the oven. We called Tim’s son, Nathan, who was just getting off work at 10:00 p.m. and begged, “Please. We will die unless you bring brownies home with you.”

What would you eat for your last meal?
Spaghetti, but only if I make the sauce myself. All store-bought spaghetti sauce has onions in it. I might even have some Iowa corn on the cob, and key lime pie.

What relaxes you the most?
A coma. Ok, not that. I’m stealing my answer from septembermom again. Reading relaxes me more than anything.

If you could go anywhere in the world for the next hour, where would you go?
Someplace that has sand, blue skies and lots of water, as in an oceanic amount of water. Although I would prefer it to be warm, if I had to spend an hour back on the beach in Washington, I would not complain.

Which language do you want to learn?
I would like to finish learning Spanish. I took four years in high school, but in the last two years, they just put me back in with first and second year students since they didn’t have enough people for a full class. After Spanish maybe Hebrew.

What do you love most about where you currently live?
I live in a valley between two mountain ranges, so it feels very secluded. There’s not much crime except for the meth-heads who mainly just kill each other. It’s a small town, but it’s only 90 miles from culture when I absolutely cannot take the seclusion any longer. I also love that the people here go on and on about how terrible the winters are. I just laugh and say “Winter? You want to see winter? Spend January in Iowa baby, then come back here and complain about winter.”

Describe your dream home.
My dream home has a front room decorated like heaven, with very light (so as to be almost white) pink walls and white carpet. There is a huge crystal chandelier hanging in the center, which acts as a prism, causing little rainbows to dance across the walls. There is a beautiful Greg Olsen painting on the impression wall and soft music playing in the background. The kitchen has a center island and lots of cupboard space. There is an attached dining room with a serving area that connects to the kitchen. Also on the main level is the library which houses all of our computers in addition to shelves of all the best books. Down the hall is the laundry room and a huge bathroom. The bathroom has an atrium where there are lots of plants nourished by the sunshine coming through the solar pane in the roof. There is also a mammoth jetted tub. The bathroom is L-shaped with an additional door enclosing the toilet area. We have a two-level basement. On the first level is the family room where there’s a home theater, piano, and pool table. Turn the corner and go down the stairs to find the second level which houses the food storage area, the dance/exercise studio, and an all-purpose storage room. Now on to the second floor. The second floor holds four bedrooms. We don’t need four bedrooms, but as long as we are dreaming, three of these rooms would be used for guests and the fourth one would be Jeremiah’s. Jeremiah’s room would have a loft where he could hang out when he wants to be alone and read. *Sputter, cough* Make that when he wants to build an elaborate Lego Star Wars city. He would have a tunnel with an attached slide that would whisk him down to the family room. Two more bathrooms on the second floor. On the third floor is the master (that’s me) bedroom. Of course it is done in lavender. It has a huge window seat for reading, a walk-in closet and another jetted tub. There are vending machines for midnight snacks of Little Debbies, Snickers, Nacho Doritos and Dr. Pepper. What I meant to say is there’s a refrigerator for midnight snacks of grapes, apples, oranges, water and celery. Off the master bedroom is a balcony with a view to a garden below. There’s a vegetable garden, a flower garden and a winding path through an arbor graced with ponds and fountains. And to top it off—my own treehouse! Did I mention secret passageways? No dream house is complete without secret passages, especially one to the treehouse! (This dreamhouse can only be achieved by your clicking on the Amazon link and buying something—Wah, ha ha!)

If you were a time traveler what era would you live in?
I would never want to go backward because I love all the amenities I now have--contacts, curling iron, flush toilets, the internet, and Pizza Hut. So I guess I would go forward, into the future and visit my descendants.

What is your favorite color?
Purple, lavender, lilac, iris, plum, eggplant, or violet. I can’t decide.

What is your favorite piece of clothing in your own wardrobe?
A pair of black pants that my daughter bought for me. They make me feel like dancin’. With Irish clicky shoes.

What were you doing ten years ago?
I am sure that I was going crazy as a working mom with a ten-month old. I am positive that exactly ten years ago to this very moment I was asking God, “But why can’t I be a stay-at-home mom? Why do I always have to work?” Wah, wah, wah.

If you had $300 now, what would you spend it on?
Printer cartridges, a few new shirts, a haircut for my son so he doesn’t look like a Beatle, a pair of comfortable shoes for my flat-footed husband, and some potted flowers to decorate my front yard.

What are you going to do after this?
Go to bed. Or maybe check a few blogs, heh, heh.

What are your favorite films?
Please see the sidebar on my blog that has a list of “Movies I Have Seen More than 5X.” Then add Twilight and I am David to that list.

Your favorite books?
The University of Success by Og Mandino, Star Girl by Henry Winterfeld, The Princess Brideby William Goldman, Xanth Novels by Piers Anthony, Ender's Game by Orson Scott Card, All Harry Potters by J.K Rowling, Swinging Sisters by Madonna Dries Christensen (shut UP, it is not about that,) Les Miserables by Victor Hugo, Big Susan by Elizabeth Orton Jones, Watership Down by Richard Adams, pretty much anything Orson Scott Card has written or will ever write, The Host by Stephenie Meyer, Heidi by Johanna Spyri, The Blue Castle by Lucy Maud Montgomery, and the scriptures. Sorry, I only had room for 1/100 of my list.

Do you collect anything?
Compliments. Do you have any for me? I've also been known to involuntarily collect Troll dolls.

What makes you follow a blog?
Good writing, humor, a unique perspective, cool pictures and free food.

What was the most enjoyable thing you did today?
I babysat my newish grandson. He’s such a happy little bug.

Ann's Question:What makes you comment on a blog?
I comment when the person has something valuable to say and I want them to know how much I appreciated their thoughts, or if I cannot control the urge to inject some humor.

Amy's Question:What is your favorite thing to do when you have some free time?
Reading, blogging, hanging out by water (a pool, a lake, a waterfall, the sink,) traveling.

Tonya's question:What is a talent you wished you had?
Oh, how I wish I could sing. I have a monotone voice that I can make go up and down in a sing-song manner, but it is not truly singing.

Gena's question:As you may know, I am all about "Serene Moments", so what is your "Serene Moment"?
I feel serene when it is a sunny day and there is water moving nearby.

Noelle's question: If you could go to heaven who would you see, and why?
My perfect mother. If they kept her out just because of her swearing, I'll be mad.

Vickie's question: Who is your favorite actor?
Jim Caviezel. He knocks me out with his intensity no matter what movie I see him in.

Kitten's question: Other than Blogger, Facebook, and/or Twitter, what are your most frequently-visited websites?
http://www.earlytorise.com/ for the best advice ever on how to be successful in life
http://www.newswithviews.com/ for the best news that is not under the control of the mainstream media
http://teachers.net/wong for the best website on effective teaching
http://www.sugardoodle.net/mambo for ideas on Sunday School lessons

Septembermom’s question: What was your favorite subject in school?
Reading, literature and spelling.

Randi’s question: Whose music affects you?
I love any music that is danceable. That means I like very few slow songs. (Whispering, shh… this means that I like Michael Jackson) I also like Il Divo, Celtic Woman, Josh Groban, Heart, and my son-in-law, Matt.


And now, “Tag! You’re it!” to :

Ken
Pen

I picked them because they rhyme.

Are You a Giver or a Taker?

Scenario

You are at the office. You and your team have been working overtime, trying to increase sales for your business. The early indications are that the strategies you have implemented are working. Sales seem to be up, but you won’t know for sure until you get the final report for the quarter. Your boss asks to meet the entire team for lunch to discuss the report.

After everyone has assembled at the local pizza place, your boss takes out a folder and asks for attention.

“I am happy to announce,” she says, “that sales are up 46% for the quarter.”

After the applause dies down, she says, “Now for a little surprise.”

You hoot and holler with the rest of your team, wondering what surprise she has in store.

“Each one of you…” She pauses for dramatic effect. “…and your spouse, will be going on a three-day Caribbean cruise at the end of this month.”

The reactions begin.

Will you react with the Takers? Or will you react with the Givers?

The Takers React

“Are you paying for our plane tickets to get there?” asks Robert.

“Yes, plane tickets are paid for,” answers your boss.

“What about gas to drive to the airport? Who’s paying for our gas?”

“Each couple will be responsible for their own transportation to and from the airport.”

“So it’s going to cost me money to take advantage of this little reward?” persists Robert.

“ I knew there had to be a catch,” says Suzanne. “And what about child care? Are you reimbursing us for babysitters?”

“Excuse me, but I just went on a cruise last year,” says Jacqueline. “Can I just have the money you would spend on my trip instead?”

Your boss looks increasingly uncomfortable.

“I’m not married, so can I bring someone else, or can I have the money that my spouse would have cost if I was married?” asked Lawrence.

“How many days off work does this entail, and how are we going to be compensated for our lost work hours?" asks Suzanne.

“Cruises make me sick,” says Lisa. “Can I go to Vegas instead?”

By this point your boss is sorry she ever spent the last few days planning this surprise for her employees. She’s ready to call off the whole trip. Until…


The Givers React

“Well I think this sounds like great fun!” exclaims Mark. “I have never been on a cruise.”

“It will be so much fun!” agrees Jodi. “Hey, I’ve got an idea. Why don’t we make a list of all the people who need child care, and then see if we can combine sitters?”

“Oh that’s a great idea! says Jan. “I just have the one little guy so maybe we can save on sitter costs if we go in together.”

“That might work with the gas situation too,” says Dirk. “I’ll make a list to send around to see who wants to car pool to the airport. I’ve got a van that seats eight. We can split the gas costs.”

“These are great ideas,” says Mark. “I know everyone will be busy packing the night before, so I’ll have a potluck open house at my home. People can just drop by and grab some food and not have to worry about making a dinner while they’re getting ready to go.”

Your boss looks at them and smiles. This trip might be salvageable after all. Whose side were you on?


In most situations in life there is an opportunity for you to be a giver or a taker, a positive force or a negative force, lightness or darkness. Could you almost feel the lifeblood being sucked out of the room when you heard the reactions of the Takers? Were you thinking of people you know who react in exactly that way, no matter what the situation? Do you want to be around Takers? (Both the Takers and the Givers were based on people I know. I'll bet you know some Takers and Givers in your own life.)


Are You a Giver or a Taker?

Are you always early for work, dates, meetings?
Or do you consistently show up late for everything, forcing others to wait, to restart the meeting, to call to see where you are, or to make excuses for you?

Are you self motivated? When there’s work to be done, do you start right in, with the end goal in mind?
Or do you wait for someone to motivate you, to offer incentives, to give prizes or rewards before you’ll put in your best effort?

Are you the lender, when others are in need?
Or are you the borrower, always needing money, tools, a ride?

Do you offer emotional support to others?
Or are you always the one needing support, because something bad happened to you again?

Are you self-sufficient?
Or, do you feel it’s someone else’s job to take care of you? (Your parents’, your employer’s, the government’s)

Do you give your employer your best effort?
Or do you feel your employer “owes” you something for your services? (internet access, cigarette breaks, time for personal calls)

Are you the parent to your children?
Or do you expect your children to parent you or to be your emotional crutch? (Mommy has another one of her headaches so make your own dinner, Daddy feels grumpy when he gets home from work so go to your friend’s house, Mother doesn’t get any “me” time so she’s going out, Father had a good life until kids came along, etc.)

Are you accountable for your own actions?
Or is someone else always to blame? (Your parents were mean to you, or it’s not your fault your work isn’t done because your co-workers keep talking to you, or your boss just doesn’t understand your special needs.)

Is life full of good things, happy people, exciting events and meaningful moments?
Or do bad things always happen to you? Are other people just “lucky?” Is life one soap opera after another?


What Happens When a Giver Has to be a Taker?

Life happens, even to Givers. You may lose your job and have to be on food stamps for a while. The one tool you need is the one that your brother-in-law has. Your spouse becomes disabled and you need a shoulder to cry on. Does relying on someone else for a while turn you into a Taker?

No. Everyone in the course of life is either a giver or a taker. What matters is how you spend the majority of your time. Does every day involve more giving or more taking?

I read an article recently by a Rabbi Yoni Posnick, who addresses this very thing. (He got his inspiration from another Rabbi—Eliyahu Eliezer Dessler.) To quote Rabbi Posnick:

“What happens when one giver gives to another giver? Inevitably the giver becomes a taker. Therefore Rabbi Dessler adds a third category, the receiver.The receiver receives from other givers what they wish to give and, in return, reasserts his role as a giver by saying “thank you.” Expressing appreciation converts every act of receiving into an act of giving. By doing so, you have given a heartfelt expression of goodwill to the other.”

The Art of Gratitude

To avoid being continual Takers, we must be grateful for the people who surround us. Take a moment to ponder those who are deserving of our gratitude. Have you ever thanked:

Your spouse for cooking a meal, taking out the garbage, spending time with the kids, or cutting the lawn?

Your boss for your job?

Your children when they do their chores without being told or when you see their kindness toward a sibling?

Your co-workers for being pleasant to work with?

A cashier when she double-bags those heavy juice bottles?

Your minister, priest, rabbi, for a touching sermon?

Your parents for all they have done for you?

A teacher who believed in you?

Your neighbor who shoveled part of your walk too?

Your friends for making life bearable, and laughing with you?

Your siblings, for loving you no matter how big of a jerk you were as a child?



Training our Children to be Givers

In high school, we had a mandatory marriage class. Our teacher, Father Ramaeker, impressed upon us the following: “If you go into a marriage saying everything will be 50/50, your marriage will fail. You must go into a marriage expecting 90/10, that is you give 90% and expect only 10% of your partner. If all people entered marriage with that in mind, there would be no divorce.”

How do we ensure that our children are Givers when they grow up? How do we make sure that they are not continually the Taker in a marriage, a job, a friendship?

According to Rabbi Posnick:
“It is our responsibility to train our children to be “givers.” They should
not be allowed to merely “take”---here is the car, here is the credit card,
here is some money---with little or no appreciation or positive expression
of gratitude in return. This fosters an attitude that life is about “taking”
and it most certainly carries over into marriage.”


It not only carries over into marriage, but also our work relationships, parent/child relationships and friendships. Raising a child with an entitlement mentality is a form of abuse. The child who grows up expecting everything to be handed over is socially crippled for life. The little girl grows up expecting her every whim to be satisfied by her husband. Or she believes the commercials that tell her to spend all the money she has shopping because she “deserves it.” Or she can’t understand why she gets fired from job after job, blaming her employer because she can’t be expected to spend every minute at work actually working.

The little boy grows up railing at the government for not providing health insurance, or railing at his employer for firing him for being late, or railing at his wife for not working enough hours.

So, what is it? Shall we strive to be a community of Givers or Takers? Will we raise our children to bless others or to be “entitled?”

What can we do today, to be a Giver? What giving actions are your trademark?

Sunday Serenity 7-5-09

Laying a tattered Old Glory to rest July 4, 2009

Touched by an Osmond

I hope all of you are having a meaningful July 4th.

We are getting ready to go to our local high school stadium to listen to orators talk about our history and freedom. The two men represented by the orators will be Thomas Payne and my husband’s favorite, Patrick Henry. Following the oral presentations are a patriotic choir and of course fireworks.

Our family celebration actually began yesterday on July 3rd. We--Tim, Jeremiah, granddaughter Juliah and I-- traveled to a local town, about 15 minutes away to see a motocross exhibition and listen to a concert by local boy Merrill Osmond. (See previous post on the private joke between God and me regarding the Osmonds.)

We had a truly enjoyable evening. The skies were clear with the temperature hovering around 70 degrees. None of us had ever seen a motocross event, but since it was part of our ticket price, we attended. I was surprised at both the level of skill and the level of insanity of the riders. I had assumed that during the motocross event we would be watching men on motorcycles on an obstacle course. Not so. These daredevils flew across a 70-foot space between a ramp and a dirt hill, doing flips with and handstands on, their bikes.


After the exhibition, the concert began. Merrill has fifty years in the entertainment business and is a consummate performer. He began by walking through the audience, shaking hands with his fans. Silence please…drumroll…an Osmond touched me. He also shook hands with Jeremiah, who was thrilled no doubt because of maternal influence.

Merrill performed a selection of his oldies along with some contemporary music, and was surprised when a young pre-teen girl sang along to one of his songs. He held the mike so she could sing along with him. I think he felt truly honored. His two sons walked through the audience selecting people for a fan dance contest. The audience selected the winners and four participants each got a collector’s Merrill Osmond teddy bear that Merrill said was valued at $500.

A highlight of the concert was his daughter Heather, who performed two songs, one of which she had written herself in behalf of our troops. If we don’t hear more from her in the future, I would be surprised.

A light breeze cooled fans who sat on camp chairs and in the bleachers or who laid on blankets sprawled on the grounds of the football stadium. Little children danced on the grass, waving multi-colored neon necklaces and wands to the music as the light faded. A waxing gibbous moon (I didn’t teach fifth grade for nothin’) shone reflected light onto the field.



Merrill topped the evening by speaking about his love for family and for this country. He said he could have chosen to raise his children anywhere, but he chose to raise them in an area where he knew they would grow up to be good people. He mentioned his concern for his friends, the Jacksons, who were dealing with their tragedy right now. He sang The Impossible Dream, his father’s favorite song, in honor of him. The strains of his final song faded out as the fireworks exploded.

I am certain that as a young girl, my attraction for the Osmonds was mostly because they were cute and sang good songs. As an adult, my level of appreciation lies more in the fact that they are true showmen, strong vocalists, and can harmonize like no others. A show put on by an Osmond will never be a waste of your money.

Note: In the video, Merrill shakes my hand right after the guy whose back is in the shot. You will see Merrill looking in the camera briefly, then I sit down.

Thursday Thoughts of a Twitterless Thinker 7-2-09

Yes, ladies and gentlemen, it’s time once again for the Blithering Bloggeress, the Rambling Writer, the Queen of Quang to subject you all to that time-honored tradition—Thursday Thoughts of a Twitterless Thinker!

Since I don’t Twitter, I don’t want to deny anyone the privilege of knowing what I thought about all day. It's the rage.

I have been watching, for a few years now, So You Think You Can Dance and Dancing With The Stars. Five seasons ago, I didn’t know the difference between an Argentine Tango and a Paso Doble. Today, I sit and watch either show and say things like, “They shouldn’t have smiled during that tango,” or “ The footwork needed to be a little more aggressive on that paso. He was stepping too lightly.” My husband has even become quite adept at predicting what the judges will say.

Over the years, I have watched dance evolve. Several years ago, the nation watched in awe as Cheryl Burke and Drew Lachey did an amazing freestyle to Save a Horse by Big and Rich on Dancing with the Stars and won the competition. If that same routine was performed today, I am certain it would be pegged as “not enough for this level of competition.” And they would be right. Dance has progressed to where a certain level of gymnastics is almost expected for a performance to even be considered mediocre.

Last night, on SYTYCD, Melissa and Ade treated the nation to a Romeo and Juliet pas de deux. Today I think about what a thrill it is to watch the dance culture develop, literally step by step.

For a visual treat, watch this video of Oren Lavie’s Her Morning Elegance.

And now, for my fellow wordsmiths, the best quote I’ve read this week: Despite some famous examples to the contrary, if you can say "new" and you can say "clear", then you can say "new clear." Robert Brault

My son came home from Boy Scouts to tell me that he shimmied up a 30 foot rope without knots in it. Apparently in the last two years, he is only the second scout to be able to get to the top. Now I understand why, at his entry into Boy Scouts, his new scout leader told me, “We don’t like moms to come to scouting events or else the boys won’t have any fun.”

Speaking of wordsmiths, I love hearing words used in new ways or hearing phrases crafted in a unique style. Do you make up our own words? That’s fine with me as long as you don’t care that I steal it ( and use it as the title of my blog.) It should come as no surprise then that I have a new hobby. When I go to someone else’s blog, and I have to type the nonsense word in order to leave a comment, sometimes I write the nonsense word down because I love it. I am determined to find a use for the following “words” : koant, scril, deaph, honsfer, aniaste, maahjo, chastess, and my all-time favorite----eflush. No longer will I delete emails, I will eflush them! Come on, you writers out there. Can you think of a way to use the above words in a sentence? All mimsy were the borogoves!* Yeah!

What is an “ono” dinner? Computer Geek and I got invited to one and Wikipedia was no help.

With vacation time upon us, I couldn’t get out of my mind a beautiful post at Goodlife Zen, on having a “staycation.” I was surprised to find that the guest author was none other than one of Foreign Quang’s most frequent commenters, Janice Hunter. It contains some beautiful thoughts so I encourage you to pay her a visit.

I get to go see Merrill Osmond in concert on Friday. The Osmosis never ends!

My last thought on this lovely Thursday is actually a rant. I don’t rant often so when I do, you know I mean it, darn it! So tonight, I’m watching a dancing show (surprise) and there are two commercials for horror flicks. One was called Orphan and the other was The Unborn. (No, this is not a repeat of my gore rant from a few weeks ago.) I am ranting about the use of children in horror films. I saw the previews for these two films and was disturbed to see children so fiendishly used. I love little kids, and their sweet spirits and their innocence. I can’t for the life of me, understand people who corrupt all that is good about childhood by dressing up our babies as objects of evil. I can’t fathom allowing my ten-year old son to be painted up as a demonic character, nor can I imagine my five-year old grandson. No money in the world could sway me to allow such an abomination. Am I being too sensitive? What are your thoughts?

* Not an original sentence. Stolen with love from the Master Of All Made Up Words,
Lewis Carroll.

Sunday Serenity 6-28-09

A must-see when in Vegas: The Bellagio Fountain

Thursday Thoughts of a Twitterless Thinker

The next time you go to the grocery store and complain because your New York Strip steaks are $5.99 a pound, just remember, it could be worse. You could be paying $13 a pound for M&M’s in Las Vegas. I kid you not. But they sure are pretty, huh? Don't ask my daughter about it. Sore subject.



My son passed his test to obtain his yellow belt in Kyuki-Do yesterday. He worked very hard so in a few days he’ll actually be belted in a brief ceremony. I think he can now officially kick my butt. I’d better stay on his good side. Mighty mothering moment when you realize your child can whup ya.

Something I’ve never understood—how deodorant works on men. I mean basically they just apply it to their underarm hair, right? So how does that help anything?

Last summer I bought a wooden planter that I thought would look great filled with bright red petunias. I’ve never been able to use it yet. Why? Because every time I think I’m going to use it, my son is playing with it and complains that I am trying to take away his “gun base.” Need ideas for your ten-year-old’s birthday? Get him a planter.




I had a moment of quiet today. Jere was away playing at a friend’s homemade water park. The thermometer read 95 degrees so I turned on the swamp cooler. I had just eaten lunch of leftover spaghetti and sat down to read some blogs. Lulled by the serenity of the moment, I sat there, reflecting on my momentary solitude while blindly staring at my computer screen. The cooler hummed on hypnotically, and was soon accompanied by the far-off sound of a neighbor mowing his lawn. The mower got closer and closer and closer until…suddenly…Holy Chainsaws, Batman! It wasn’t a mower after all. I had awakened myself with the sound of my own snoring.

And then, Michael Jackson died. Nothing left to think.