End of June Question #2

I loved the answers you gave yesterday, especially because I learned some new things. Thanks for playing along! If you missed the first day, you may jump in at any time.

Question Number 2:

Have you ever hurt someone's feelings and still regret it to this day? Tell us about it.

Controlling My Chaos says: Yes. I "replied to all" on a political e-mail that was sent to me by a friend. I was annoyed that she sent it to me, knowing I did not share her beliefs, and I responded negatively. It hurt her, and I will always regret it. :(

Auntie M. says:  The only incidence that comes to mind is this. I hurt a friends feelings at lunch, and later apologized and we were fine. A couple of years later I found out she was a hypocrite, not only with me but with all our mutual friends. She has since died. The other friends don't know what I know about her and I don't plan to ever tell them. Let them remember her however they wish.

Septembermom says: Once we were in a heated argument with one of my husband's aunts. We were all stubborn over a certain issue. I said a few things to her that I regret to this day.

And here's my answer: Years ago I was a struggling single mother working more than one job. At a church gathering, a woman I knew by name-only came up to me and said, "So, Randi, what do you like to do for fun?"  I immediately went into "me, me, me" mode and started saying something stupid and selfish like, "Fun? I don't have time for fun. My whole day is consumed with work, my girls, more work, then getting up to do it all over again." Blah, blah, blah...

Later, a mutual friend called me and asked me to explain how the interaction went. She told me the woman said, "Boy, Randi sure shut me down. I tried to initiate a friendship with her and see if maybe she wanted to get together sometime, but she made sure I knew loud and clear that she wanted no part of it. Her whole attitude was 'Don't bother me.'"  Was she correct in her assessment of me? Yup. That's exactly how my attitude came across and and soon as the mutual friend told me, I felt shame for my behavior.  I intended to apologize and maybe later invite her to go out for a bite to eat, but I procrastinated and never did it. Yeah, I was a jerk.