Friday, October 29, 2010

Thoughts of a Twitterless Thinker 10-29-2010 edition

I thought it was about time I got rid of that ghastly snake picture so I’m pushing it down the page via this new post.  Since I’m not a Tweeter, but I am a thinker, here goes the latest installment of Thoughts of a Twitterless Thinker.

I’ve had a lot of “whys” running through my brain lately. If you know the answer to any of these nagging questions, please feel free to jump in.

*Why is starting a forest fire as easy as dropping a match, but starting a fire in your wood-burning stove takes scientific precision? Then try to keep it going for at least thirty minutes. It’s almost as if you have to play matchmaker (ha, I’m funny!) with the flame and the wood.

*The word camouflage is generally shortened to the word “camo.”  Why then, is the word ammunition shortened to “ammo?”  Shouldn’t it be “ammu?”

*The average lifespan of a housefly is thirty days. So why are fall flies much more vicious than summer flies?  Summer flies hover around your watermelon and your lemonade and your macaroni salad. Fall flies go for the head. It’s as if they sense that their thirty days will soon be over---“I want my last meal and dang it, it’s going to be someone’s face!”

*Why don’t dishwashers ever really work? I have had six dishwashers over the past ten years and all of them require intensive scrubbing before placing the dishes inside or else I will end up with a fine coating of foreign quang all over my dishes, glasses and silverware. I’ve tried different detergents, different rinses, and vinegar to no avail. It’s basically more a dish sterilizer than a dish washer.

*Why is a lion called King of the Jungle when he doesn’t live in a jungle?

*Does anyone know why Nacho Doritos contain pork products? My daughter called to tell me that gem this week and I had to look it up to see for myself.

Fun coincidence of the week: Computer Geek and I were watching a documentary on warthogs last night. (Yeah, we’re fun.) Although the adults are rather odd looking the babies were quite fetching.  I said, “Even warthogs are cute at this age.”  The very next sentence spoken by the narrator was, “Even warthogs are adorable at three weeks.”

Confession time: I am a Halloween wimp. My email box is flooded with food recipes for faux body parts such as fingers, eyeballs, brains, intestines, other internal organs, and skulls. Let’s not forget decorating all these with fake blood.  Is it just me, or does eating this kind of “food” seem a tad bit…oh…cannibalistic?

While I’m on a mini-rant, what is so cool about skulls? When did our society decide that it was all right to start decorating with the body parts of dead people? I see skulls on kids’ clothing, shoes, skateboards, bikes, not to mention all over in their artwork.  I’ve even seen skull wallpaper! And did you hear that the man who started Body World now wants to make jewelry out of body parts? It is all just a little too creepy for my taste. I guess I’ll crawl back into my wimpy cave.

Computer Geek’s father passed away a couple of days ago. He was eighty-six years old, and was not in the best of health even before they found cancer a few weeks ago. CG was able to sneak away last week and go visit his father one more time. I am so happy he was able to go.

We were disturbed though by something one of his nurses said. When CG’s dad lost his appetite, we were told that the nursing home would no longer feed him. Apparently “they become euphoric when they lose their appetite and no longer notice that they aren’t being fed.”   Seriously?  Let’s try that rationale the next time a farmer gets arrested for starving his animals to death. “But officer, when my cows are near death they become euphoric, so they didn’t notice a thing.”  Luckily CG’s sister snuck in some peanut butter sandwiches.

On the brighter side, I was feeling crafty this week and made this sign for my kitchen. 

If you like it, you can make one too at one of my favorite sites, Tatertots and Jello. You can download the picture there. It is a spin-off of the re-discovered British sign from WWII.

When you hand out a box of paperclips to a group of ninth graders and tell them to attach a header sheet to their assignment, you never  know in what shape that box of clips will make its way back to you.

Computer Geek had a birthday this week. He turned fifty-two. Hoolie, Pinque and Avatar stopped by to wish their Grandpa Geek a happy day.

I guess I’m done with all the thinking for now, so I’ll head off to bed—as soon as I get rid of this fly that’s trying to use my face as a landing strip.


  1. Whew, I'm glad to be back. Still afraid I'll run into that snake post. Great picture of CG's grandkids. They (somewhat) take the sting out of losing Dad. I don't mean that to sound flippant.
    Losing a parent, no matter his age or condtion, is tough.

  2. I'm sorry for your family's loss. That's terrible about taking away his food. I'm glad that your husband had that last chance to see him.

    What a pretty picture of the girls! Hope CG had a great birthday.

    I agree with you that dishwashers are frustrating. Sometimes I wish I could go back to exclusively handwashing them, but my laziness kicks in :) You're right about the skull fascination. I just don't get it. Enjoyed all of your "why" questions! Why is a Lion a King of anything considering the female lion does all the work? Isn't that the way it is everywhere?? LOL.

  3. Auntie M: I'm glad you're back too! Every time I had to check something on the blog I would whiz past that stupid snake picture [not that I'm not glad you sent it to me, Mary Jane, no siree. I am so happy you thought of me and I'll treasure it forever. Maybe, just maybe, I'll NEVER take it off my phone background...]
    You're right, kids do take some of the sting out of death. I think that's why God gives us eighteen years for them to grow up (and sometimes longer!) unlike, say, the child of a horse, who learns to walk the day it is born. Kids can take the sting out of anything rotten in life. Losing a parent is tough, even when you expect it. There's no escaping that until they take their last breath, you are still hoping for a miracle.

    septembermom: Yes, we were very fortunate that CG got to make that last trip. If financial circumstances had been different, I would have gone too. Many people never get that last chance, so we were grateful.
    I have told CG many times that I'm just going back to hand-washing. The only attractive thing about a dishwasher, as far as I'm concerned is that it's a nice storage unit for dirty dishes.
    I laughed so hard at your lion comment! Indeed--why IS he king of anything? Too funny.

  4. So sorry about your FIL. And what a horrible attitude about feeding. Ugh.
    BTW - my dishwasher is rinsing and everything comes out clean!

  5. Jill: Thanks for your kind thoughts.Yeah,the feeding thing had us pretty upset.

    Ok, let me get this straight. You can actually put DIRTY dishes in your dishwasher and they will come out CLEAN? I must know more details...

  6. I rarely use my dishwasher because for two of us, I simply wash the day's dishes by hand after dinner. Not a big job. But I do a load of dishes once a month or so to keep the machine lubricated (says the resident handyman). Anyway, it does a super job. Clean as a whistle. And yes, Jill's machine does a great job, too.

  7. Auntie M: I am stunned. One person with a dishwasher that actually works is a fluke, but two people means there's hope!

  8. Dishwashers are not for us as we are amongst the few who actually like having wet hands.
    You post was funny...and sad, of course. I hope CG's dad didn't pass away on his birthday.
    86 is a good age. I'd be very happy to match it, although good health would have to feature. Can you remember his last smile? Does he leave a widow?

  9. Ken: Thanks for your nice words. Yes, CG's dad did pass away on his birthday, but he didn't find out about it until the next day. I do remember the last time I saw his smile. I was able to visit him in Seattle last year for his 85th b-day. He looked happy to be surrounded by family. And yes, CG's mom is still alive, though she is being cared for in a rest home and has children who are near her. Thank you so much for asking.


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