In 2003, I was a single mother, having lived through a failed marriage. My son was five years old and was tended by a seemingly endless parade of babysitters while I worked fifty hours a week. I didn't enjoy my status but there seemed to be no other options for me.
My daughter Em at the time had a friend named Gnome. Gnome had a father who was single, having recently suffered through a failed marriage also. Em would tell me how sometimes she and Gnome would discuss the possibility of her mom/her dad getting together, making them sisters. "Never!" I would say. Gnome's dad, a computer programmer by trade, was an extremely annoying individual.
He would call me.
I wouldn't answer the phone.
He would knock at my door
I would hide until he gave up.
He would drop by my place of work.
I would be grateful for every customer who walked in the door, keeping me from having to talk to him.
People would say, "Maybe you should give him a chance."
I would respond in my best pirate voice, "Nevah!"
He was a stalker, in my opinion.
Drove me crazy.
On July 14, 2003, he walked into the cell phone store that I managed. No customers were there, just my co-worker and I, meaning I would have to deal with him.
We chit-chatted aimlessly until he uttered those words that made me realize the depth of my loathing.
He: "Oh--it's July 14th."
Me: "Yeah, Bastille Day."
He: "How did you know that?" I wanted to slap that incredulous look right off his face.
Me: "You expected me not to know that. Therefore the only reason you would have possibly brought it up was to hope that I would therefore ask, 'What's special about July 14th?' so that you could explain it to a dummy like me." Then with my best Clair Huxtable wave of the index finger I said, "You ain't the only smart one!"
I was mad. Really mad. That arrogant pompous horse's butt.
After he left, I said to my co-worker, "I will never marry that man. UGH!"
He kept on calling.
On April 10, 2004 we were married. I have had six happy years with Computer Geek. We are extremely compatible, which I guess means that I am an arrogant pompous mare.
Em and Gnome are sisters.
Happy Bastille Day, Computer Geek. Whatever that means.